tums

facebook gives me heartburn.

"i have amnesia but before that we were in love." or "our feet are dating but the rest of us isn't speaking" are two of the very few reasons i think it is ok to put "it's complicated" as your relationship status.

i often feel it is a popularity battle. this is probably only because i am losing.

i hate being "friends" with people i dislike, haven't talked to forever, or pretty much just don't know. but i'm bad at ignoring them.

millions of "!!!" and ":) (: :D" cause me to vomit.

people will, and often do, post anything as their status. there are somethings you should keep to yourself, and others you probably should never consider.

and trust me, that is not all.

waldo

i'm one of those annoying people that for some reason feels a burning need to constantly stand out. to be an original. you know the people. maybe you are one. you think every morning as you get dressed, "does anyone i know wear an outfit like this?" and change a million times accordingly.

well this morning, as i was putting way too much thought into the originality of my outside, i had a thought.

why in the blazes do i try so hard to be an original? the mere fact that i am an individual means i am original. God made me that way. so no matter what, i am different.

that thought of course doesn't necessarily mean i will try less hard, it was just a really good thought.

i'm on to you.

either ben or jerry is actually a woman. it has to be so. no man would know the exact recipe to make a girl feel like her ice cream binge was completely vindicated.

spinster, loner, whatev.

sometimes, most the time, i act like a spinster. or a loner.

for example i often seclude myself in my room on tuesday nights with a can of coke and an episode of the bachelorette. (which thank you roomies, i am addicted to. it's fabulous.)

tonight i hit a high that can only be described as religious lonerness.

i went to the movie charlie st. cloud. at a movie theater. by myself.

let me explain how this event happened. (by the way, the previews for the movie event.... totally creepy to me.) (haha totes creep tess. totes.)

you know when you wake up in the morning and you decide, "i'm gonna try today, cause i want to look cute tonight to go do something." so you curl your hair and wear make up and maybe make a savers stop to get something awesome.

but then, nothing happens. everyone is gone. or busy. and you feel like doing something anyway.

lately i've pulled away from the need to have some one else with me in order to enjoy myself. i think that might mean i'm grown up. ew. so cause i wanted to i went to a movie. with myself. i even got all dolled up and it was great.

i was a loner tonight. completely. and i loved it. i think i might take myself to a movie next week too.

(if loner was a religion would you have to worship alone? ponderous.)

never give up. never surrender.

We are going on an adventure. a crusade of sorts. to conquer a river called snake. in a state called wyoming. at a campsite named creek station. we are going to test our strength, to show nature we are strong. and we will succeed! but mostly we'll just eat a ton of delicious food.

my family (extended and such) go to the snake river every other year for a beloved river run. it's delicious fun. allow me to show you how we prepare.


first, we say goodbye to my favorite person.
then pack up the hoodies. the big boy ones that don't show dirt. mmm, perfect.
always needed are more games than any one will play
and oh yes please some of mom's fresh salsa
and these sexy things are a must.


so goodbye world for a week as i go to live in nature and enjoy myself.

Amen.

"To any who may be struggling to see [the] light and find

hope, I say: Hold on. Keep trying. God loves you. Things

will improve."

-Jeffery R. Holland.

talk found here

invasion.

yesterday my house was invaded.

it was terrifying.

i even had to run away for a bit.

luckily, i made it out alive.

fourteen year old boys are a different species. but a species i thought i understood,

being that i often have the maturity level of an average fourteen year old boy.

poop is funny. so kill me.

what i didn't understand was that in concentrations of 20, fourteen year old boys are a lethal weapon.

a loud, inappropriate, swarming, lethal weapon.

some words to the wise:

1. don't feed them hot dogs. they get too much enjoyment out of saying wiener.

2. don't give them water balloons while still within range of their throw.

3. run. run far away, to the juice press for a smoothie.

4. don't expect to sleep when 10 of them sleep over.

5. love that your brother is in heaven so as to refrain from head biting.